Q: Congratulations on the release of DIARY OF A MAD GIRL: ME VS. THE OIL INDUSTRY VS. MY NONPROFIT JOB. Described as “Part diary, part existential comedy, and part psychedelic feminist fever dream,” what inspired you to write this story?

Honestly, recording my audiobook for my first book, DIARY OF A SAD GIRL: OR MY QUEST TO FIND LOVE ON A DYING PLANET, was so fun I was like, let’s write another. As I began writing, I noticed so many themes of burnout and economic (as well as ecological) collapse emerging in my writing and my life.

Often for me, I don’t know what’s sitting under the surface until I begin to write, and that was the case here. I wrote, and a story followed.

Q: This book is also described as “An illustrated work of literary satire exploring climate anxiety, burnout culture, millennial disillusionment, and the absurdity of surviving late-stage capitalism.” What are you hoping readers take away from DIARY OF A MAD GIRL?

Oh my god, so much. First, I want people to like me. Which is insane, but a big motivator for everything I do.

But as a climate organizer and artist, I’m very concerned about how individualist our culture is. I share my writing to create community, so that people know they are not alone in their climate grief, hopelessness, anger. Our world and society are so broken and sick, and as a result, so many of us feel depressed, anxious, and scared. And yet, our tools for dealing with these collective issues are individualistic — therapy, drugs, self-help, and self-care. And of course I do all these things! I love my Lexapro and my therapist and my yoga instructors, but I do think collective trauma requires collective healing. And that is a big part of the book. We need each other. And the best way to heal collective trauma is through collective action. And that can look so many ways; it can be through art, movement, mutual aid, volunteering, or just talking to our neighbors.

Q: With parallels to our current-day society, does this book give us hope for the future? Or is this more of an attempt to capture and package younger generations’ climate change-induced anxiety?

I really want people to get a sense of hope from my book. The oil industry *wants* us to give up. And I think on just on the basis of denying them my corporation in our collective destruction, I refuse.

I see hope as a choice. One we get to make, and one that our survival depends on. And I think so much of our burnout is due to a lack of hope. Why are we working so hard if we are all doomed? This treadmill to nowhere, so to speak.

My character begins to set boundaries and refuse the norms we are all swimming in. When it comes to work, play, art. She finds healing and hope in selfish acts of resistance. In play. In joy.

As a climate organizer, I’m often really frustrated with the lack of joy in our movements. Yes, the problems are dire, but this is our life! Things are already so hard - maybe we don’t need to match the hardness with more hardness. Maybe we can be softer. Watery. Flow through.

Q: How did your time at Harvard influence writing this piece? How do you think it influenced your overall career trajectory as a whole?

 Oh, wow. I’ve had a real 180 when it comes to Harvard. And I think that comes through in this book and my work. My first book really untangles my time at the Lampoon and how the hazing and culture turned me nihilist and cold.

This book touches on how hookup culture coupled with childhood trauma left me feeling inadequate, and the work of writing the book helped me heal it. But not to spoil, my character returns to Harvard to give a speech at her reunion, signaling a shift in looking to Harvard to solve her problems and tell her what to do, to instead using it as a pulpit to spread her ideas of resistance.

—

I really appreciate Harvard now that I’m 11 years out. What a special, beautiful, bubble I was lucky to be a part of.

My whole goal of high school was to be the best so I could go to a good school. Which I did. Once I got to Harvard I just wanted to be Iiked. I thought it would be a panacea. I thought it would solve all my problems and give me direction. But by the end I felt more lost.

I think as a result I no longer idolize institutes. Oh they have their strengths (resources, intelligent people) but for me I’ve learned that my power does not come from the top down. It comes from the bottom up. From communities. From talking to people on the ground. From the earth. Harvard is a tool, a beautiful special tool with faults. And now that I know that, I have a much better relationship to the school.

I think processing this is part of why I chose to self publish. I looked to an institution to give me validation and to some extent it did, but it never felt like enough. And so, why should I wait for someone to decide my art is good enough? I think it is good enough. I want to share it.

Q: What was the most challenging part of writing this story? Were there any scenes or characters that were particularly difficult to get right, especially considering the sensitive nature of the topics you were dealing with (capitalism, climate change, hope)?

Actually, the hardest part was the portions about “My Boyfriend.” I finished the first draft when we were still together, but when it came to editing we’d broken up. This book really feels like a documentation of things falling apart, and that was hard to get through. The good times. The bad.It took a lot of willpower to not completely erase the sweet moments between us or add “that dick!” to his name. I really love the character of My Boyfriend. (As do I love my Ex.) And book three will definitely dive into our breakup once I have the distance and energy to dive into my heartbreak.

Q:  What’s your process like for starting, writing, illustrating, and finishing a story? What are the challenges, and what comes easiest to you in the process?

My process is so chaotic. At first I just wrote about everything. Then I got sick of writing everything that happened. So I took a break. Then I wanted to write more fiction. So I did that. Then I got sick of that. I didn’t want to write anything. I began drawing, just my friends. I put the book aside. I picked it back up (who knows what inspired that). I started a new book. I got an editor! Thank god I got an editor. I owe so much to Veronika. She believed in my writing when I did not. When I wanted to cut everything. She helped me sort through the chaos and through our dialogue we created a plan, and I had some accountability.

I hear about people waking up every day and writing, and I have tried that. But geez, after decades of working on my laptop I have come to despise my screen. I think for book three I’ll buy a typewriter or write it all by hand.

All this is to say, I wrote in bursts, I wrote nothing at all, I wrote every day for hours. I wrote when I felt like it. I wrote when I didn’t feel like it out of obligation. And geez, I actually am in awe that this book came together at all.

Q: Who are some writers or storytellers who have influenced you? What is one book you think everyone should read?

Yes!! I’m so glad you asked this. This book was very much inspired by Mona Awad, Ruth Ozeki, Elena Ferrante, Rebecca Makkai, and Melissa Broder. I also found that Carmen Maria Machado’s stunning memoir IN THE DREAMHOUSE gave me permission to write whatever I want. In different tones. To be playful. Etc.

Q: What's next for you? Are there any upcoming projects or themes you’re excited to explore in your future work?

Oh yes! I’m noodling on book three, DIARY OF A BAD GIRL, 1000 BOYFRIENDS, which I think will explore my forays into non-monogamy and magic. I do think this book will be more fictional, partially to give me space to explore sex and boundaries while being safe in my body.

I have a lot of anger at the patriarchy - especially in this administration - I am so angry. DIARY OF A MAD GIRL is actually not that angry. Sure, I’m mad at the oil industry, but I think I’m more Mad as in crazy. And I’m very excited to see what happens when I give myself permission to really go off and get revenge on the systems that oppress women’s bodies.